So I know the holidays are all over and done, but there’s something I need to get off my chest. And yes, I realize I sound like the Grinch, so bear with me.
As a person with diabetes and emotional eating issues, part of me absolutely HATES the holidays!
Whew! I feel better now.
Don’t get me wrong. As I warned you before, I LOVE Christmas! I really, really do! It’s the food that comes with it that I don’t.
The holidays and their food come around, and I feel like acting like a two year old. Laying on the ground and having a full-blown kicking, screaming “IT’S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!” fit. Diabetes is extra hard around the holidays.
Yes, I know I can eat that. And I do. Along with doing my effing best to bolus for it. But no where is safe. Cookies, cake, pie, candy, cupcakes–everywhere you go has something. And if you have the willpower to say no to all of it, I applaud you. I wish I did. But I don’t.
Even when I don’t overdo it and just have one piece or one cookie, that doesn’t mean my bgs won’t shoot the moon. It’s frustrating.
As much as I wanted to have that meltdown, I refuse to give diabetes that victory. Overall, I’m please with how I handled the holidays. Yes, the emotional eating reared its ugly head. But not as bad as it could have been. As much as I wanted to rip my CGM out for all the beeping, it helped me keep tabs on things, and do a better job of handling the consequences of said emotional eating. And the lovely weather helped too. My therapist suggested going for a walk when I get stressed and/or emotional. It really did help.
I also got to see so many friends and loved ones this holiday season. This I treasure and am so thankful for. Especially my 90 year old grandma and 93 year old grandpa, whom we honestly didn’t think would make it to another Christmas. They are still here. And I wouldn’t trade my time with them for anything.
But I’m also a firm believer in acknowledging the difficult things. Acknowledge them, face them, and move on from there. And when I tweeted something Christmas Eve stating my feelings about the holidays at that moment, I got a lot of love and support. The #DOC never fails. And those responses, reminding me that I wasn’t the only one, helped me face the rest of that weekend and focus on the joy and the things to be thankful for.
So thanks for putting up with my Grinchiness, even if it is a little late.